When the neurologist confirmed my MS diagnosis 14 years ago, I remember feeling like I'd been pushed off a cliff. The ground beneath me vanished and I was free-falling into an uncertain future filled with MRIs, medication schedules, and the terrifying prospect of disability.
What I didn't realise then was that I wasn't falling alone. A network of women - my mother, sisters, friends - had already formed an invisible safety net beneath me.
My journey with multiple sclerosis has taught me many things, but perhaps the most profound lesson has been about the unique power of female friendship and support. There's something special about the way women show up for each other that transcends conventional notions of caregiving. It's not about practical help, or at least not yet; it's about a particular kind of emotional intelligence and resilience that I've found predominantly in my female support system.
Female friendships have sustained me through my darkest periods. These women have mastered the art of being present without being suffocating, helpful without being patronising. This isn't to say that the men in my life haven't been supportive. They have, tremendously. But there's a particular kind of empathy, a willingness to sit with discomfort rather than rush to fix it, that I've experienced from women. They understand intuitively that sometimes what I need isn't solutions but solidarity.
As I navigate my second decade with MS, I'm profoundly grateful for this female energy surrounding me. It reminds me daily that vulnerability isn't weakness - it's the foundation of our most meaningful connections. The women in my life have taught me that "girl power" isn't about denying hardship or pretending to be invincible. It's about facing challenges together, lending strength when needed, and celebrating each other's resilience.
One of my favourite parts of my week is when a few of my friends and I trade short videos about our day-to-day lives. It is just a few minutes, usually filmed in the car or at the sideline of a child’s activity, or even while taking makeup off at night, and it is a time for us to focus solely on ourselves. It’s an idea, stolen from a group of Australian men on Tiktok, called a “Wednesday Waffle” and it must be filmed once a week - usually on a Wednesday but there’s wiggle room! It can be as light or as dark as needed. It is a truly excellent way of keeping in touch when we don’t get to see each other often enough.
As my daughter gets older, and hormones and big feelings come into play for her and her friends, I do my best to encourage the female connections in her life. She is a large part of the “girl power” evident in my life and I want to be sure that she grows up appreciating the strong women around her, so that she can continue to blossom into the strongest of us all.
My MS may take certain things from me, but it's also given me the gift of experiencing the depth and power of female friendship. In a world that often tries to pit women against each other, my support system stands as beautiful proof of what we can be for each other when it matters most.
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