MS & Me

As we live with many of the symptoms of multiple sclerosis, it can feel like we’re aging in fast forward. What happens when our actual age begins to catch up to how old we feel?

September marks another year since my Multiple Sclerosis (MS) diagnosis, a date that always prompts reflection on how far I've come, the challenges I've faced, and the strength I've discovered within myself. While some refer to this as their "MS-iversary" and choose to celebrate it, I personally don't view it as an occasion for celebration. However, I respect and support those who find meaning in marking this day.

Living with Multiple Sclerosis (MS) brings a unique set of challenges, both physical and emotional. One of the most challenging emotions is guilt. Whether it's feeling like a burden or guilt over not being able to work or engage in activities as before, or simply needing extra care, these feelings can be overwhelming.

Many years ago, I remember trying to articulate how an MS diagnosis affects your relationships. I told my Mam that it’s like being at the epicentre of an earthquake. The diagnosis just keeps rippling out until it touches every aspect of your life and every person with whom you have any semblance of a relationship. The earthquake creates a canyon too wide for some friendships to continue any further. This natural disaster somehow pushes you closer to people who might surprise you. Rescue can come from new sources and people that you never even thought you’d encounter on this journey called life.

One thing we can all agree on is the cost of living with an incurable illness like multiple sclerosis. It slices and dices through your physical life at will, no matter how you think your life is. It equally has little regard for your mental and emotional life. 

This blog title gives me anxiety. What does a “better me” mean? Should I be writing an article like the many I’ve seen where people tell stories about how better their life is since MS diagnosis and how much they have achieved? People climbing mountains or running marathons? I have read a lot where people seem grateful for MS. I’m happy for them but let's get one thing straight from the start - I am not grateful for my diagnosis. MS has in no way improved my life. It sucks and any of the positive things that have come from it, like my learning mindfulness and becoming a calmer person, I like to think I would have discovered in time anyway. 

'The wind beneath my wings’: MS & Me Guest Blog Yvonne McBennett as part of World MS Day Campaign 'My Diagnosis' shares her personal story of being diagnosed with MS, the initial shock and the impact on her life and her family. Through her resilience and the support of MS Ireland, she discovers a sense of belonging. 

To mark World MS Day, we launched a letter-writing initiative, supported by Novartis, to provide a platform for those living with MS to share their unique diagnosis stories. We are kick starting this campaign by sharing six powerful letters, written by members of the MS community. 

My name is Stefan I'm 32 and live in London. I was diagnosed with MS in 2017. I am a teacher, a poet and a huge swimmer. I hope you enjoy this poem and also hope that you know that you are not by yourself in dealing with MS. I wrote this poem because my friend thought it would be a good idea and that it would help me. He was right and now I want to share my experiences with you. Always remember you are not alone! Enjoy the poem. 

In 2016, Aoife Kirwan wrote a blog about disclosing her MS. Today, she looks back on whether she still feels the same way or not.